Day 235: Stretching Is For Length

You won't believe it! I am in the upright position, twisting over no sideways eating chips and milk. I did measure it. Yep, that's right "it." I did it with a ruler and i found its length of growth. I am so proud, but also very disappointed. For what will i do till it goes away? I was so stupid; i did not think to drink the silky smooth milk from heaven before in the days preceding the event. And then it happened. So completely appalled, i noticed it move. It won't be long now, i do not think and it will near the top so that I may chomp it off. My nail, on that ungawdly finger of divine shapings, rests a white, malignant marking, ruining the view. Of course they are not like spick and span but that is for no purpose. The mark is moving up my nail... I have the suspicious suspicion that a miniature worm died in my inner depths and now its ghostly form is seeping out through my de-perfectionated nail. Oh, thank the macabre elements for their unrighteously depleted levels reminiscent of the unmistakable mark of death defying salivation. I said stop drooling.

That Hairy Sitting Has Withered From The Bone.